A Different Perspective - Long Distance Blues

I attempted to write an article about what a person endures during a long distance relationship. I sent the draft to my girlfriend to see what she thought —if it could be improved, edited, etc. Her response is under my original article. Her response goes to show how it's always enlightening to get someone else's perspective on a subject.

We all know the abundant clichés about long term relationships, but one thing’s for sure they are tough. We all have days when we long to see, hug and kiss our other half, it’s particularly hard when your better half is on the other side of the world. Aside from the obvious problems like time differences, distance, etc. There’s a dearth of hidden psychological issues that arise from this type of relationship. Whatever about the loss of physically being with another person it’s another strain completely when it comes to the mental side. Tiredness often plays a big part as neither party is on an even keel, it’s either early morning or late at night on either side. Nowadays you’ll be met with the stock phrase sure you have the Internet, Skype, Viber, e-mails it was a lot harder in our day. That may be well and good to some people, I for one disagree. I agree nothing compares the short-lived buzz you get when you see and hear your girlfriend/boyfriend, wife/husband through a laptop screen. For those short-lived moments, it’s like you fall in love with the person all over again. The anticipation, the racing heartbeat as you wait for the other person to pick up. You’re bursting at the seams to tell them all your news only to instantly forget it once the conversation is underway. If I had a euro for every time I got off Skype cursing that I didn’t ask a particular question I’d be quite the wealthy man. 

All the feelings of happiness and contentment are quickly stolen away from you as you hit the red phone button and the screen goes blank again, you’re left with only your reflection and an empty feeling. No amount of technology or gimmicks can replicate the feeling you get when you’re with the other person face-to-face. Long distance relationships are hard and require a lot of effort, you must put your complete and total trust in another person. We all know the hardship is worth it in the end, after all a few short months or year(s) apart are nothing compared to a lifetime together. However, the in-between part is still quite hard.

My girlfriend's response - 

We all know long distance relationships are hard. But nobody talks about the hidden problems that couples face when they are in a long distance relationship- mainly because you sound like a selfish prick if you do. You have to watch your partner be okay without you.

You have to watch them go out, have fun and succeed, all without you there. You pretend to be happy for them because you know you should, and you do. But you also can't help but feel a sting because you aren't there. You're not experiencing it with them. You're not the number one go to for the chats because you’re not there when the 'thing' happens and by the time you're told of the 'thing,' it's told in a blasé way because it's be told before and has lost its significance. You know you should be happy, and you are happy for your partner, but it stings. And if they can survive without you—why would they choose to keep you?
Their world doesn’t revolve around you anymore and the harsh realisation that yours doesn't revolve around them either. It sparks endless self-reflection, criticism and wondering what your relationship is based on. If it's strong enough, it will survive. If not, another relationship will bite the dust. The good news is if it does survive- you know that it's worth the trouble.